Ive always believed that when ones back is up against the wall, you will see their true character emerge. It’s funny I have always thought that statement was a negative connotation. We live in a world where everyone wants winners. Truth is, each individual in this world sets their own standard of what a winner is. So it is very possible that when you win you win, or when you lose you win, because at the end of the day winning is not everything. And it certainly not what meets everyone’s thoughts on what winning is. Winning is what you make of it.
I have lived by this understanding since before I even know what these words meant to me. Satisfaction is all in the eyes of the beholder. Some people are after material things while there are others that are after the heart. The difference is material things at the end of the day hold no value, you cannot take them with you when you pass, and nor will those close to you care for most of these material things. Yes, it makes life a bit easier to cope with but what people will remember, is how you decided to live your life, be it go or be it bad. you see material things can depreciate in value, but what you do with your values can appreciate you as a person or depreciate.
I have spent a lot of time trying to bend and blend to the will of others so that they would like the person I was. I have done this so much that I did not even know the person that I am. I hope I can do a better job of helping you to find out who you are. At times it will probably seem like I pushed you so much, but the goal is to always make sure the child is better than the parent. One day you will have children and hopefully you will feel the same.
Learning to balance all these things are not easy to do. And I wished I had learned how to do this while I was younger. Instead I was trying to make everyone happy about who I was that I never took the time to see if I was happy with who I was. As I begin to spend more and more time with myself in meditation, I am finding out about myself and who I am and the values that I have.
I am doing this way to late in my opinion, but its important to know its never to late, as long as your alive. And I will always and forever be that beacon of light for you, the one I couldnt be for myself until now. Its funny I remember a quote from one of the batman movies, the butler Alfred Pennyworth (Michael Gough) would question the young Bruce Wayne, and “Why do we fall sir? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.”
And may you forever know that you will always have a helping when you need while picking yourself up. Because fall we always and I believe what makes the person is what they do when they get back up.
Jamarow Le Flore